"You're powerful when you're real," my favorite grad school professor used to say to get his counseling students to share feelings and be vulnerable. Vulnerability is NOT a weakness. It's a powerful experience. Every time I open myself up and share with others my experience of sadness, loss, grief, pain, or stress, I am amazed at the compassion and outpouring of support I receive.I am currently experiencing a high level of stress and decided to be vulnerable with other family members, friends, and even fans of my Facebook business page. (Yes, that's me in the picture...I know not flattering at all. I was going for vulnerability.) Sometimes you just never know where your support is going to come from. Sources you would've never dreamed. People I haven't seen in 25+ years are offering up places to stay so I can be closer to my family, neighbors are bringing me fresh vegetables and fruit from their gardens or offering to dog-sit, colleagues are offering to be contacts for my clients while I'm away from work, and family and friends are utilizing their strengths to care for me and my family, checking in on us with phone calls and emails. The other day I received a nice friendship card from a college roommate that made me smile. I even have Facebook friends who I've never met before sending me virtual hugs and asking about my family. I tear up just thinking about how many people care.
So what are the keys to being so blessed? Courage! It takes guts to be vulnerable to another, to ask for what we need/want. And, to know that we'll be ok even if that person uses our vulnerability against us. Trust in one's self! I always chuckle to myself when someone says, "I thought I could trust him/her!" When it concerns others, trust they will be who they are. The more important person to trust is YOU! Do you trust yourself to handle life's crazy ups-n-downs? Remain open! If you really need a hug or for someone to run an errand, and they offer, please don't decline that gift! I know you might think, "I don't want to put her/him out." Or "It's no big deal." But it is! I can still hear my ex-co-worker's voice when I politely declined her offer to run an errand for me, "Don't rob me of my blessings!" She then reminded me of the importance of karma. And then sometimes, people we would've never expected to give are helping us out. Strangers even! Two years ago, I was experiencing a rough time and I found solace in the chat room of Hug Nation. Be open to the gifts however they arrive! And finally, let go of expecations! Others give in all sorts of ways, separate from what we think they should. ;) Try not to get mad. I have a friend who has yet to ask how my family is during these stressful times. Not sure why. But she always returns my calls and emails. I try not to get too frustrated with her even though I'd like her to ask. I just try to appreciate the fact that she continues to stay connected with me during this time.
If you are experiencing a rough time in your life, I encourage you to reach out and risk vulnerability. Otherwise, you might never know just how powerful you really are!
